tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20666162.post8096311087440537932..comments2024-01-30T22:53:34.269-08:00Comments on Musings of an Intrepid Commuter: irondadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17821323482397075170noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20666162.post-88353026334667092992007-10-03T21:33:00.000-07:002007-10-03T21:33:00.000-07:00My condolences Dan. Some of us know what unexpect...My condolences Dan. Some of us know what unexpected loss can do to a person left to deal with it. Probably most of us do.<BR/><BR/>You don't have to answer to anyone for responding to someone who so cavalierly endangered your life. You stood up for yourself because it was the right thing to do. But maybe you weren't as angry as you thought. You didn't go into a flying rage. You simply answered the problem. Contrary to the touchy feely bs being foisted on us at every turn, You have a right to be angry about the jerks in the world. And you have the right, nay duty to stand up to em too.<BR/><BR/>RoadbumAmerican Scooterist Bloghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16175082275638635145noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20666162.post-49547906985380239162007-10-03T09:40:00.000-07:002007-10-03T09:40:00.000-07:00My sincere condolences for all the losses you have...My sincere condolences for all the losses you have endured over the past couple of years. I think you will find that posting on your blog what happened and your feelings about it will be very therapeutic. I know in my case that's true. The process of writing often clarifies what I am feeling and why. Once I am clear on that positive action can follow to enable healing.Kanohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07061130052392660661noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20666162.post-31865232947328948232007-10-02T22:40:00.000-07:002007-10-02T22:40:00.000-07:00"The risks are bad enough without adding to them b..."The risks are bad enough without adding to them by our own unwise actions. Such was the case yesterday." <BR/><BR/>I don't think flipping him off was 'unwise'. It's probably one of the mildest reactions I can think of to an attack. I flipped off the guy in VA who tried to hit both Karl & I in June. (We just testified last week.) <BR/><BR/>Wish I could have gotten some alone time with him, but he drove to the police station & walked right into a group of officers. Probably saved his life. We were both really shaken & furious, & both have some* training in fighting. [*vast understatement] <BR/><BR/><BR/>"As long as he comes back at me I've no compunctions about hitting him again." <BR/><BR/>He was the aggressor from the start, deliberately blinding you, causing danger not only to you but to others around you. I'd like to have seen his face when he realised he'd gotten in over his head. Too 'macho' to just walk away, or stay down. Idiot. <BR/><BR/><BR/>"I think they like knowing a guy would stand up for them..." <BR/><BR/>From this woman's perspective, yes it's nice to know that someone would stand _with_ me if I needed the backup, or speak up if someone were talking trash about me. But I don't like being around someone who's violent or in a rage, even if it's 'for' me & not directed at me. <BR/><BR/><BR/>"With my state of mind I most likely wouldn't have let her ride with me." <BR/><BR/>(quietly, gently) Should _you_ have been riding with you? <BR/><BR/><BR/>Sounds like you're on the receiving end of too many stresses in too short a time. I agree with Lucky: "You, sir, need and deserve a hug." <BR/><BR/>On one of my email lists, we give hugs like this: <BR/>{{{{{Dan}}}}} <BR/><BR/>I hope things get better for you soon. <BR/><BR/><BR/>-Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20666162.post-72933834279186285942007-10-02T21:17:00.000-07:002007-10-02T21:17:00.000-07:00Bryce,You know, the situation reminds me of when a...Bryce,<BR/>You know, the situation reminds me of when a cop shoots someone. They know they should feel bad according to society's ideas. Yet the feeling of triumphing over someone who wanted to take their life is heady. The conflict between the two is what causes the problems, not the action itself. I sort of feel like that.<BR/><BR/>If by "small fissure" you mean I'm starting to crack, it's possible. Have to find an outlet. Sharing the experience here helped a lot.<BR/><BR/>Bill,<BR/>I was really hesistant to share this. In the end, the desire to share something I felt was really important won out, even if it meant I could look bad in the process.<BR/><BR/>Coming from you, I'm honored that you felt this was a good post. When you write "real man" I know you aren't talking about this false machismo we see so much of. Thanks for lumping me into that group.<BR/><BR/>Steven,<BR/>Thanks for sharing. Your comments on where to go next touch a vital element. I'm working on that.<BR/><BR/>Charlie6,<BR/>Thanks for the reminder. The truck's distinctive enough. What if he has another rig? I'll try to remain vigilant. <BR/><BR/>Mad,<BR/>I always love to see bullies get theirs. It felt good to be the delivery guy!<BR/><BR/>Steve,<BR/>You're the perfect one to ask this question of. Is it possible to care too much? Is it better to care less and thus remain stronger, or to care and be vulnerable? I know what you'll say, of course. There's a price to pay either way. It's a cost versus reward thing, isn't it?<BR/><BR/>Don,<BR/>Thanks for letting me know you're out there. I never thought about striking a blow on behalf of my two wheeled comrades. Glad it was perceived that way.<BR/><BR/>You get it. There's a place for anger that's directed and controlled. It's just so easy for it to get out of hand. Letting anger out has to be a carefully calculated decision, not a knee-jerk reaction.<BR/><BR/>Lucky,<BR/>Yes, remember to breathe. I was reliving the intensity as I wrote. Did reading the post make you feel it? On the one hand, I'm sorry for putting you through it. On the other, I was able to accurately share what I felt.<BR/><BR/>Thanks for the mojo. I can use it. Then I'll try to pass it along to someone else who needs it.irondadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17821323482397075170noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20666162.post-78416511025910407942007-10-02T19:22:00.000-07:002007-10-02T19:22:00.000-07:00Excuse me while I try to exhale here.....Ok.You, s...Excuse me while I try to exhale here.....<BR/><BR/><BR/>Ok.<BR/><BR/>You, sir, need and deserve a hug. Sorry to hear about your losses. My thoughts are with you & I'll try to send some good mojo your way.Luckyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12481824369632937289noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20666162.post-29036654391480552272007-10-02T14:42:00.000-07:002007-10-02T14:42:00.000-07:00Dan,I think your cup is more opportune than you th...Dan,<BR/><BR/>I think your cup is more opportune than you think.<BR/><BR/>That day, you stood up for more than yourself. You stood up for every two-wheeler who's taken abuse from other drivers and couldn't or wouldn't react. I've had motorists throw bottles at me on my bicycle and try to run me off the road on my scooter. There have been times I wish I had the opportunity to beat them senseless for it. Your act was both gratifying and empowering.<BR/><BR/>For standing up for all of us, for doing what I have never been able to do, I applaud you. But the cup's warning is that such acts encourage others in similar positions to do the same. I can feel the contagion, and it is terrible.<BR/><BR/>I'm sorry for your losses: You don't know me, but I've been here with you through the last six months. And I'm glad you shared this story—<I>with</I> the Starbucks moral.<BR/><BR/>With thanks,<BR/>Don, St LouisAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20666162.post-21080833365265358502007-10-02T07:26:00.000-07:002007-10-02T07:26:00.000-07:00Dan,I'm sorry for your losses. Reading your post ...Dan,<BR/><BR/>I'm sorry for your losses. Reading your post I could not help but think that the losses you have been faced with are huge. I'll just reinforce Bryce Lee's suggestions though I know how hard it is to reach out though you already are. The fact that you wrote about it is more than many could manage. It seems as if you are always willing to look in the mirror.<BR/><BR/>I don't believe in coincidence---regardless of how that cup came to sit in front of you it is a sign along the trail and you have picked it up. <BR/><BR/>I certainly don't think less of you for what happened with the truck driver. I'm glad nothing worse happened since these are the kind of incidents that can escalate badly.<BR/><BR/>If there is a silver lining here it is your sharing of your reactions to the police officers. We should all learn that lesson. <BR/><BR/>You're a good man Dan.<BR/><BR/>Warm regards,<BR/><BR/>Steve Williams<BR/><A HREF="http://vespalx150.blogspot.com" REL="nofollow">Scooter in the Sticks</A>Steve Williamshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04540977884513559091noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20666162.post-11460225314167225952007-10-02T01:21:00.000-07:002007-10-02T01:21:00.000-07:00Sounds to me like a bully got his comeuppance, goo...Sounds to me like a bully got his comeuppance, good for you Irondad.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20666162.post-85734870363451796162007-10-01T20:28:00.000-07:002007-10-01T20:28:00.000-07:00You did just fine under several stress causes. Ma...You did just fine under several stress causes. Maybe the moron in the pickup truck will think twice before drenching or messing with riders....then again, he's probably from the shallow end of the gene pool.<BR/><BR/>Watch for him the next few days, his needy ego may try 'getting even'.redlegsrideshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10927757855921321097noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20666162.post-78034051323036290492007-10-01T17:29:00.000-07:002007-10-01T17:29:00.000-07:00There's a quote, from Bill Murray's "Groundhog Day...There's a quote, from Bill Murray's "Groundhog Day," that comes to mind.<BR/><BR/>"Don't drive angry. Don't drive angry." <BR/><BR/>...or upset, or hungry, or anxious, or or or... <BR/><BR/>but then we'd never drive (or ride), would we? <BR/><BR/>Dan, it sounds like you're normally able to compartmentalize, focus on the ride, and keep things safe and fun (and I don't say this just from this post, but from plenty of your other writing here as well). <BR/><BR/>We all break down from time to time just as our machines do, no matter how well we maintain ourselves and them. <BR/><BR/>What's important is how you recover from the incident. You don't trash the bike because of a flat tire, you take the time to fix/replace it and then move on. <BR/><BR/>Bryce has some thoughts there on the 'taking time' part; allow yourself to process your emotions for a time - they're your emotions and perfectly valid. If you don't deal with them, they'll hang around just making things worse. They'll never really go away (and you wouldn't want them to), but you'll have an easier time keeping them in their proper place. <BR/><BR/>But I'm guessing you already knew all that. <BR/><BR/>peace,<BR/>-StevenStevenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18006392231667016999noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20666162.post-65181812633313569472007-10-01T16:46:00.000-07:002007-10-01T16:46:00.000-07:00First off, I'm truly sorry for your losses. Second...First off, I'm truly sorry for your losses. Secondly, thank you for sharing this post. I look at this as one of your best.<BR/><BR/>In my opinion only, you did exactly what you and I were both taught to do in our years of being raised by real men, from the real world. A man is judged by his actions. And the actions of the pick-up driver when driving, and after he parked were wrong. Plain and simple. <BR/><BR/>The dude was wrong...you weren't.<BR/><BR/>Have fun,<BR/>BillBill Sommershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13830209488539036338noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20666162.post-83322016111623636882007-10-01T16:42:00.000-07:002007-10-01T16:42:00.000-07:00Oh Dan..been there; done that, felt remorse. Aside...Oh Dan..been there; done that, felt remorse. Aside from this list and/or your wife, is there <BR/>anybody who you feel close to, who would listen to you? <BR/><BR/>You're frustrated, angry and very<BR/>unhappy. With yourself for reacting as you did. <BR/>In some ways the pick me up truck encounter was not so much the <BR/>trigger rather the result. And if it had not been that particular<BR/>incident, something else would've let go. <BR/><BR/> You need time for you, and the <BR/>motorcycle as a psychiatrist isn't working all that well. <BR/><BR/>This may sound crazy however if you feel like crying, weeping or whatever over the passing of family or others do so. Grown men cry,<BR/>no shame in that.<BR/><BR/>We humans can only absorb so much abuse be it emotional, physical or personal.<BR/><BR/>Perhaps the pressure of two close<BR/>passings, plus that of your Dad<BR/>a year prior as well as other external activities have created a small fissure in your being.<BR/><BR/>I offer no easy solution, be it <BR/>of a religious or personal nature.<BR/><BR/>You do however need a sounding<BR/>board to expoliate your being, perhaps your musings is one method.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Bryce Lee,<BR/>somewhere in Southern OntarioBryce Leehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13945844038227214559noreply@blogger.com