Thursday, March 20, 2008

Vanity or pride?

Well, I finally did it. I now have a personalized license plate for Sophie. Some people call them "vanity plates". Whatever you call it, I got it. On a whim I called into DMV to see if the plate was taken. Since it wasn't, I took that as a good sign.

I can't tell you why I did it. It has never even been on my radar. Even Clinton was surprised when I told him what I'd done. Maybe it was because it was Sophie's anniversary of joining the clan. I'm pretty sure it wasn't anything to do with a mid-life crisis. I mean, I'm already a dedicated rider so I didn't go buy a bike like so many do. There's no sporty convertible. The only great looking blonde hanging on my arm is Katie. I hardly find myself in need of attention. Whatever the reason, there's a shiny new plate on the back. See for yourself the results of work by the Oregon State Corrections System's finest inmates.

Now people will know who they're dealing with on the road. Will they be impressed? Will they be intimidated? Will they even notice or give a dang if they do? One thing for sure is that it will be much more difficult to remain anonymous when Sophie's parked outside a bar! I'm only joking, you realize? Of course, bikes in front of a bar aren't that humorous. Maybe I shouldn't have gone there. See what having a vanity plate does to a person?

By coincidence, I noticed another vanity plate at the hotel where the business dinner was last night. When I showed the picture to Katie she told me this one suited me a little better.

What's she trying to tell me, anyway?

Actually, the nickname itself didn't come from my own vanity. It was bestowed upon me by my oldest boy and then adopted by the rest of the kids. Here's what started it all.

There was a time when I was a very ardent follower of the "iron" discipline. The gym was a second home and I'd take the family along. One time on a bet from a state cop friend I ran a mile with Clinton perched on my shoulders. That was 19 times around the indoor track. He was probably about three years old. I remember he complained about his butt hurting and I had to talk him into a few more laps to finish things. Anyway, the statue is an art project. My oldest son, Dustin, was in middle school. He's 25 now. They were required to make a clay item, fire it, and glaze it. I had no idea what he was up to. One day he brought this thing home and presented it to me. It's fashioned after the Mr. Olympia statue. On the base is inscribed "Iron Dad".

Every father wants to be a hero to his children. How can I not bear the title proudly? My son also unwittingly gave me something to live up to in a positive way. Like all personalized plates there's a deep meaning for me that most others will never know.

So if you see me out out there with my "vanity plate" please wave. Use all your fingers and try not to laugh!

Miles and smiles,



Conchscooter said...

Stupid, stupid, stupid. Next hit and run every single eye witness will be able to identify you as you ride away. I guess bank robberies aren't in your future anymore either. Nor passing on the double yellow lines. You are a marked man, my friend.

irondad said...

How long have you been a dispatcher? Eyewitnesses being accurate?

No worries. The Hi-Viz 'Stich will distract them. Just in case, I paid extra for the two sided plate. A button on the bars exposes the flip side. It says,

Who? Me?

Take care,

Anonymous said...

What a great post. The closest thing I have to a plate with my screen name / nickname on it is a frogskin that I have on my kickstand that has "Sarch" embossed in the leather.

Anonymous said...

Oh yeah, I meant to mention that your sneaky idea is brilliant. You know, now that I think about it I think that is what MY dad did!

Anonymous said...

I have a magnetic star on my Fridge, that bears the inscription
"All Star Grand Pa", I never knew I was in the big leagues, much made the all-star team. I do appreciate it but I liked the card that had a kids typical crayon scribled "art work" and on the inside "I bet you are gonna put this on the refrigerator".

Lucky said...

As long as it doesn't say "So Fast" or "2hot4u" it's probably ok.

I've thought about getting a plate that says "Lucky," but I decided it would just tempt fate to end me in an ironic way. You know, like having a car fall off an auto hauler onto me.

"How'd he die again?"

"Car fell on him."

"Some luck..."

Conchscooter said...

You are way too smart for your own good! Your sons are lucky.

irondad said...

The plate was sort of fun and sort of embarrassing in a way. Guess I wanted to poke a little fun at myself to make sure I wasn't being uppity. About the sneaky tip. See how insidious it is?

Ah, the refrigerator, a home's place of honor. With four kids it was years before I knew what color mine really was. Sounds like you make proper use of yours, as well.

That was a problem with a nickname like yours that I never thought of! The funny irony of it all. The only thing funnier would be if it was a shipping container of frozen pizzas. Reminds me of the poster for the lost dog. Something about a dog missing one eye, one ear, and one paw. Answers to the name of "Lucky".

Strangely enough, I've heard that "too smart" thing from my wife for years!

Take care,

Bryce said...

Not sure if your review previous
postings. When I started riding there
were no such items, anywhere of personalized plates. You got what was issued, each year a new plate. Then the province got smart and the plates got renewed with 30 days of your birthday. And that was in 1973! So
as soon as all the plates were issued for that year, embossed with 1973. In late 1980 the province announced personalized plates for cars and motorcycles IF you were willing to pay the price. In 1981 the current goldwing was obtained, I ordered a personalized plate C$200,please and reflective. Car plates didn't become reflectorized until about ten yeears ago. And then only for special plates.

So my motorcycle has a personalized plate, 1-UP!! The car also has a
personalized plate, again the same
fee but fortwo plates, one front and one rear, my ham call sign
VA3TRN. V for Canada, A for the
issue number, 3 for Ontario and the actual sign
TRN short for TRaiN my other hobby.

BTW sticker renewal for the bike
is half the rate for the car which
is $74.00. I usually buy the stickers for two years at time;
to ensure the emissions tests are passed before hand. Emission tests have to be passed before the vehicle either two or four wheels
gets a sticker. Otherwise you can junk the vehicle or have it repaired up to $500 value. If the emission repair is over $500
only, then you can keep the car but
can't sell it, it must be scrapped
within two years.

So far my vehicles have been good
both bike and car. Top me it is an
additional tax of $35.00.

If I do close the book on riding,
will keep the plate, am supposed to
turn it in however it will get framed as a memory of those once
happy and joyful days.